Let Yourself Go

My absence has not gone unnoticed. I get that. Things have been moving at light speed as of late. With my pending relocation to North Carolina for job reasons, and trips to that area to get a feel, my time has been quite limited. Having said that, I just came back from a splendid vacation in Puerto Rico and I feel refreshed and ready to further delve into the subject of my pending move from all I know.

And it is in that last sentence that the crux of the subject shape shifts.  New England is all I have known since the age of ten. Its nooks, its people, its seasons, the way sunlight magnifies the already present beauty that surrounds it. Many people I know, dear dear friends and so on.

There are many reasons both personal and professional that led me to make that decision. It is a decision that was given much thought and consideration. In the end, it makes sense, perhaps not to others, but such is human nature. Change sometimes translates to fear, trepidation, failure...at least to others.

Does it mean goodbye? Perhaps not. Perhaps I'll go down there and hate it, or miss New England too much.  After all, it is a 12 month commitment and then I an free to do as I'd like. But as I stated in my second paragraph, New England is all I've known...and I long to know more about other places outside of it because of that very reason. Sure, I could sit idle, comfortably, stay here and seek employment elsewhere and so on...and I'd always wonder in the back of my mind about that opportunity, to live elsewhere..

I cannot predict the future, but what I do know is that I am comfortable with the idea of the move.  In my heart of hearts I am comfortable and at ease with the idea.

New England will always be my home, always. It cannot and will never be replaced.

Interestingly, during my vacation to Puerto Rico, I took a drive by myself to the house I grew up in.  A house I lived in between ages 4-10 - my childhood years. And then, in the blink of an eye I found myself living in the States, learning a new language, a new way of life.  It was good to see the old house, brought back many memories and provided perspective. I sat on my car and looked intently at the house that was once my home, my shelter. How far I had come. I felt centered.

I cannot express enough how much I will miss all of it...everything and everyone. But at this station in life a new path has opened...

In conclusion, I echo the words of Hunter S. Thompson in his eloquent piece called "Security"..

"As an afterthought, it seems hardly proper to write of life without once mentioning happiness; so we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?"